Deech_

You’re not living if you don’t have a sense of impending doom every so often.

It’s a really beautiful night.  It’s rare to be able to see any stars at night here in the suburbs of Chicago, but tonight the skies are especially clear.  Maybe it’s the full moon.

The moon, especially when it’s full, gives me a feeling.  I can’t quite put a label on this feeling, but I like it.  Knowing that someone special who is hundreds of miles away might be looking at the same moon that I am looking at, it’s the sort of connection that I crave so often.  But it’s connection that is made so rarely.

Everyone always raves about “first loves” and how great and how magical and how wonderful and how powerful it is. I think first love is overrated.  Not that it isn’t important, because it is.  It sets the tone for the rest of your life, how you love others and how you are loved by others, as well.  They should never be forgotten and they will always hold a very dear and special place in your heart.

But I think that, more important than your “first love”, your last love is the most important relationship of your life.  Who’s going to the be the person who you live out your life with, the person who will be there when things get rough, the person who will never abandon you. The person who will infuriate you more than anyone but that fills you with more passion than you’ve ever known was possible.  The person who shows you how to be better, the person who helps you to take the good with the bad, the person that knows you better than yourself. This is the kind of love that is everlasting and true.

In “first loves” you are insecure, inexperienced, trying to grasp at straws that aren’t there.  But your last love…there’s just nothing like it.

Day 17: Your thought on Ugg boots.

Uggs, comfortable but not so flattering (for me, anyways).  Oh,and for the males who are trying to be “fashion forward” or whatever your reason for wearing them..please, just don’t.

Day 18: Do you drink soda more often then milk?

Seeing as how I do not drink milk (except on the rare, rare occasion that I decide I want to eat my cereal with milk) I would say Yes, I do drink soda more often then milk.  But I only drink Diet Coke.  Which probably isn’t such a great habit.  I must rethink all life decisions now :o (haha..)

Day 19: The initial of your crush(es).

Well, tumblr..touche.  The (es) implies that I may be some kind of crush maniac, and though this may have been the case a few years back I am proud to say that I have but one crush, alas!  Would I call it a crush? ;) Did I totally avert the question?

Day 20: Do you wear glasses? If so, what are they for?

I do have glasses but I don’t wear them because I wear contacts.  I am near sighted so that makes driving and seeing things that are further than 5 feet away kind of difficult, and dangerous.  I did just get new glasses that I will be picking up this week, and hopefully then I will be wearing glasses more often because my eyeballs do not enjoy having my finger poke at them multiple times a day, it’s quite painful.

Day 21: Your favorite subject to study.

Easily, psychology.  Ever since my AP Psych class senior year with Mrs. Rosenthal I have been in love with the world that is psychology.  It’s so much more than a subject.  It’s people, it’s the mind, it’s LIFE.  It is just the most fascinating thing to me.  

Day 22: Do you play a sport? Tell us about it.  If not, talk about a different hobby you may have.

Hmm, well in middle school (which seems like ages ago…) I played volleyball and softball.  I was absolutely horrid in softball and our team sucked, but it was a lot of fun because all my friends were on the team and we just made fun of ourselves about how bad we were.  Volleyball was always really fun, even just as a past time. I wish I had pursued it in high school because I’m fairly certain I would have at least made the B team.  But in high school I played badminton instead because it’s just such a cool sport…….all jokes aside, though, it was way more competitive than I would ever have imagined badminton to be.  But no one ever believes me when I tell them that, quite understandably.  I also played in a flag football tournament with my church one year, we came in second place.  It was a lot of fun, but training for the actual tournament was a lot more exciting.  Nowadays, I don’t engage in too many sports.  I do really enjoy snowboarding, although I’ve become deathly afraid of it after fracturing my wrist, and I also have not been in a few years. But, hey.

Day 23: Your opinions on Lady Gaga.

She is a talented musician.

Day 24: Tell us about the last movie you saw in theaters.

Think Like A Man.  It was absolutely hilarious, I actually watched it twice because it was just that good.

Day 25: Tell us about the last book you read.

Oh, man.  I’ve been on a reading binge the last few months.  It started with The Hunger Games series which I started in December.  I had forgotten how much I love  reading and getting so engrossed in a story that you become the characters.  So coming home for summer break was awesome because I have so much free time to just READ! I read My Name is Memory by Ann Brashares which was so heartbreaking and made me believe in the power of our souls and the capabilities of love.  Then I read The Language of Flowers by Vanessa Diffenbaugh.  I can’t even look at flowers the same way.  And then the last book I read (to finally answer the question) was The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson, which I just finished today.  This had been on my list for a while and now that I finally got around to it I can’t believe I didn’t read it sooner.  It was a dark and gripping mystery and I was literally holding my breath at times.  When I got to the last 50 pages I could not tear my eyes away from it for one second.  I am going to the library tomorrow to check out the second and third books in the series.

Day 26: Name one place you would love to visit one day.

Just one? Greece, Paris, Guatemala, Spain, Brazil, New York, Chile, South Africa, Boston, China, Japan, etc, etc, etc.  There is not a place I do not want to visit.

Day 27: List your three favorite girls names, three favorite boys names, and three favorite names for a pet.

Well this is kind of an idiotic question.  I didn’t know people had favorite names…I’m not partial to any one name(s).  I’d think that if I was going to name someone (presumably my child) it would be a name that bears some kind of meaning or a name that I find suits the child’s soul, essence, whatever. And same goes for pets, a name comes from the spirit of the thing being named.

Day 28: Your first celebrity crush.

Oh, man.  I’m pretty sure my first celeb crush was either Kangta from H.O.T. or Lance Bass from N’Sync.  I remember being quite fond of both of them when I was very young.

Day 29: Your opinions on the television show Glee.

Hahah. I won’t lie, Glee is one of my guilty pleasures.  I don’t know what it is.  Mr. Shuester’s curly locks, Finn’s dorky dance moves, Rachael’s seriously amazing voice, Kurt’s eccentric gayness, Sam’s boy-band cuteness, Santana’s lesbian hotness.  Whatever it is, I can’t stay away.  And it’s such a terrible show, the plot is just..I don’t know what is happening half the time.  But I like the show tunes and the dancing!

Day 30: Take a picture of yourself right now and post it, or post the most recent picture you can find.

Well it’s 7:27 am and I’m in no condition to be taking pictures of myself, so I will settle with a recent picture.  Let me just consult with my handy dandy Facebook…

30 day challenge done! It only took me….a year! :D

Aw, man. This question sucks because my favorite Disney movie, well favorite movie of all time ever, is The Lion King.  But that isn’t a “Disney Princess” movie.  To be honest, I was never into the whole Disney Princess thing.  I don’t know if it was growing up with an older brother or what, but it just never caught my attention.  I guess now, out of all of them I’d say Aladdin is my favorite.  

I pretty much failed this 30 day challenge, but I’m going to continue it anyways for a lack of better things to write about.

Favorite junk food is a really difficult question to answer because all I eat is junk food..I do have a certain affinity for fries from Mcdonald’s, chicken nuggets from Wendy’s, and oh goodness the nacho cheese from Taco Bell just tastes so good on everything.

But if I had to choose one favorite, donuts. Definitely donuts.

Your Existing Situation

“Creative and emotional, looking for ways to further expand those qualities. Looking for a partner who enjoys the same activities. Seeking adventure and new and unusual activities.”

Your Stress Sources

“Has high standards and wants to make friends with those who have equally high standards; however, she has been unsuccessful in building these types of relationships. she is feeling under appreciated and her self-esteem is damaged because of it. she is uncomfortable with the situation and wishes to escape, but refuses to make compromises or lower her standards. Puts off resolving her problems because she afraid of the conflicts it may cause. In order to feel secure, she needs to feel appreciated by others so they will do what she asks of them and respect her opinions”

Your Restrained Characteristics

Current events leave her feeling forced into compromise in order to avoid being cut off from affection or future cooperation.

Feels unhappy and isolated because she is unable to succeed in finding the cooperation and understanding she desires.

“Although she is able to find contentment through sexual activity, she feels hopeless to change her problems and difficulties and continues to make the best of what she has.”

Feels unhappy and isolated because she is unable to succeed in finding the cooperation and understanding she desires.

Current events leave her feeling forced into compromise in order to avoid being cut off from affection or future cooperation.

Your Desired Objective

“Wants interesting and exciting things to happen in her life. she is able to make others like him, because of her genuine concern for them. she is charming and open and makes friends easily. she can have an over-active imagination, which leads her to fantasize and daydream.”

Your Actual Problem

“Feeling tension and stress brought on by situations which are out of her control, leaves her feeling helpless, anxious, and in adequate. she tries to escape into a fantasy world where things go her way and her desires are easier to reach.”

Your Actual Problem #2

“Impressed by unique and one of a kind things, and by people with exceptional personalities. Tries to takes the characteristics she likes in other people and apply it to herself as well as coming across as a unique individual.”